Congratulations: You're an idiot!

With 2008 barely under way, some outstanding individuals have wasted no time leaving their mark on society.

In the race to attain top honours for stupidity, first prize must go to the 25-year-old chap from Mamelodi, near Pretoria, who is facing a perjury and defeating the ends of justice rap. This is after he reported to police that he had been relieved of his cellphone at gunpoint.

This criminal mastermind was reportedly left speechless when a detective dialled the number of the phone in question and it rang in the complainant's pocket. According to the cops, the genius could not explain the motive behind this diabolical plot.

Good one, slick!

Following closely in the footsteps of the aforementioned idiot is a 15-year-old boy, who was allegedly a member of a youth gang operating on the East Rand.

Earlier this week, the gang attacked three people in two separate incidents and stole two cellphones. The hapless youth was caught by bystanders and dragged off to the police station.

Coincidentally, a victim of the gang was also at the police station, opening a case of robbery, and recognised the teen as one of the culprits. She also identified the cellphone in the boy's hand as belonging to her.

Despite denials that he had ever seen the victim before, the young criminal was collared when a detective dialled the number supplied by the victim. You can guess the rest.

Anyway, this moron earned himself an aggravated robbery charge.

Now I'm thinking, notwithstanding the brilliant detective work in both cases (we now know that cops can read AND dial numbers), what's up with our criminals?

Perhaps the criminal sector is also suffering from the effects of SA's widely reported brain-drain. I'd say some critical skills are certainly lacking here...

Remember that new concept that South Africans became so familiar with last year, namely "load-shedding"? Well, it's back!

Martin Czernowalow, news editor, ITWeb

This may be a new year, but some things remain the same. Remember that new concept that South Africans became so familiar with last year, namely "load-shedding"? Well, it's back!

This week, ITWeb reported that, with economic activity resuming, former power-generation utility Eskom (always quick to respond to a crisis) will embark on a new cycle of rolling blackouts.

Ironically, this year, consumers will pay 14.1% more for even less electricity to fund a R150 billion programme to build new coal-fired power stations, de-mothball some others and upgrade the power distribution grid. Gotta love it!

Economists and businesses are bemoaning the fact that the power outages have caused more damage to the economy and the country's business sector than Tito Mboweni and his whole gang of trigger-happy, interest rate-hiking pirates. It now seems that SA's anticipated 6% GDP growth target is also out of reach.

Sigh. Same shit, different year.