Christmas conspiracy

By Nicola Mawson, Contributing journalist

Johannesburg, 02 Jan 2007

Traffic during the mad season - at least in Joburg - is not the only thing that disappears from the radar. As the entire country ground to a halt, I found myself trying to eek out some level of anything from service providers.

Technology kept on working, mostly. Every time the miniature cat gained entry to the house, I got a text message from Stallion Security saying that the electric fence had gone off.

The first time this happened - while we were out at a family function - it was panic stations. Someone has breached our first line of defence, me thinks. The security company calls me on my cell, and I request a patrol, and a call back.

Getting home, we discover that it was only itsy-bitsy cat entering the house, no doubt to get in from the never-ending rain. Which is just as well, as the security company took an hour to respond, later claiming that the vehicle en route to my residence had been written off.

Which wouldn't be too bad, if this were a once off. It isn't. Either the company does not phone, and just sends a patrol car, or the control room calls and leaves me a voice mail, but does not follow up with a patrol car. Useful.

E-mail revenge

Every time the miniature cat gained entry to the house, I got a text message from Stallion Security saying that the electric fence had gone off.
Nicola Mawson, senior journalist, ITWeb

I now, however, have the attention of a senior bod at the company, and will be sending through yet another rude e-mail just as soon as I'm done typing here. It'll probably get lost in her inbox.

Getting any sense out of Vodacom this festive season was also, as hubby discovered, impossible.

He had been trying to get answers to a few questions for over a year, and the event that precipitated this: hubby would have to pay to renew his contract.

Eventually, after ages of to-and-froing via e-mail, he gives up and sends a rude e-mail to the CEO's official complaints box. And gets a call back via voicemail. Said call back person promises to call back, but him and hubby never managed to have an actual conversation.

So, on my return to the office, thinking naively that I may now get some work done, I discover over 200 e-mails in my inbox. I was one of the lucky ones - of the 900 e-mails received by a colleague, 80% were less than useful.